Four Kids, Four Perspectives
Lorne and I almost got around to talking about Dad the week before last, but between small kids and logistics, we didn't much. We did play some guitar together...much the same way as Dad and I used to do, almost in lieu of conversation. I understand that better now than I used to when Dad would say, "Let's get out the guitars..." It was just an easy way of being together that somehow touched a common chord that was deeper than conversation could usually ever reach.
(And I'm really enjoying the blues guitar lessons -- his guitar is very sweet indeed, and lovely to handle and hear. This week's lesson really brought together the stuff I was finding hard to practice last week. Anyway, the timing was perfect -- it just seemed like the right time to begin to play again. Funny how life it sometimes.)
In reflecting on all that, it really seems at times as though each of us remembers a different person. Each of us had a very different relationship with Dad, understood him differently and he us. We each had our own special moments with him, special stories that none of the others shared, as well as unique exasperations, frustrations or disappointments...and he with us, too. In some ways, he's a hard person to remember as a group.
All of which ends up being a reminder that life is short. The strongest emotion I remember from a year ago remains:
With anyone, friend or family, if you've got issues or unresolved conflicts, fix them while you have the chance. In the end, everything else is just stuff.